


Precious

by Anonymous



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Bottom Kylo Ren, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Femslash, Happy Ending, Kylo Ren Needs a Hug, Kylo Ren Redemption, Praise Kink, Self-Hatred, Smut, Strap-Ons, Top Rey (Star Wars), Trans Female Character, Trans Kylo Ren
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-22
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-12 20:47:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29640438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Kylo doesn't think she deserves to feel this good. Rey shows her otherwise.
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 5
Kudos: 19
Collections: anonymous





	Precious

**Author's Note:**

> Me, gesturing wildly: LESBIANS
> 
> This takes place in some undefined post-redemption world that probably doesn’t include TROS cause fuck that noise. Also the self-hatred Kylo experiences is NOT related to her being trans, it's about her time with Snoke/the First Order, just in case you were concerned about that

Kylo gripped the sheets, moaning as Rey slipped a second finger inside her. Even just this, the necessary foreplay and preparation – it felt so _good_. Kylo didn’t understand how the simplest touches could overwhelm her so easily, two slim fingers inside her knowing just what to do reducing her to moans and choked off cries. And though Kylo didn’t have much experience to speak of on this front, she had a feeling Rey was particularly good at it.

Rey set her dry hand on Kylo’s lower back, a warm, solid pressure, and Kylo whimpered, screwing her eyes shut, all the while Rey’s fingers worked steadily inside her. She couldn’t help but spread her legs for more, hitching her hips up to press into the touch. It always took so little to reduce Kylo to wordless begging.

”Good girl, that’s it,” Rey cooed, curling her fingers just so to pull another cry out of Kylo. “You’re almost ready.”

The praise made Kylo bite her lip to keep from making an embarrassing noise. Rey always praised her when they did this, called her good and beautiful and precious, like she was all those things, something to be _cherished_. Kylo had trouble believing that, but Rey always said it anyway. Maybe she thought one day Kylo would believe her, would see herself as anything other than damaged goods at best, a murderous monster at worst, but Kylo wasn’t holding out hope.

Rey continued to work her fingers, then asked, “How do you feel?”

“Good,” Kylo managed, her voice pitching high from the pleasure. “I’m ready.”

Kylo glanced back as Rey slipped her fingers out and saw her smiling, an expression that never failed to make Kylo’s heart skip a beat. It was a sincere, genuine smile, and it was because of _Kylo_. To have the ability to make someone like Rey happy was incomparable to anything Kylo had accomplished during her time on the Dark side.

She watched over her shoulder as Rey slid the silicone cock into the harness and tightened the straps, shuddering a little and biting her lip as she tested the fit and the harness rubbed against her clit. Kylo spread her legs a bit more, eager to have it inside her. Her cock was hard, dripping on the sheets, and Kylo didn’t want to wait any longer.

Rey took hold of her hips and then the blunt head of the cock nudged against Kylo’s hole before pressing in, slow and steady. Rey was always so careful, nothing like how Kylo was with herself whenever she did something like this alone. Even when she rode Rey, Rey would grab her hips and encourage her to slow down, take it easy on herself, to be careful. It made something in Kylo’s chest clench.

Once Rey was finally, blessedly, fully seated, she gave an experimental, gentle roll of her hips. “How’s that feel, love?”

“Ah, good,” Kylo breathed, feeling full, her body tingling with anticipation. “You can move.”

“Okay,” Rey said, giving another slow thrust. “Don’t be afraid to let me hear you.”

_As if I have a choice on that_ , Kylo thought as she gasped when Rey pushed all the way in. Once they got started and it felt as good as it always did, Kylo would lose control of her mouth, moaning and crying out and babbling all sorts of embarrassing things. Strangely, and fortunately, though, Rey seemed to like that about her. Still, she couldn’t help but try to cling to some semblance of control while she still could.

Rey set a rhythm with smooth rolls of her hips, slow yet steady, and Kylo couldn’t help moaning, arching her back to improve the angle as the pleasure gradually built inside her. It wasn’t enough, she needed more, but she also didn’t want it to end, wanted to stay like this, with Rey, the Force tinged with their mutual pleasure, forever. She gripped the sheets tightly, distracting herself from the urge to stroke her cock and hurry things along.

“It feels so good,” Kylo couldn’t help but say and got a harder thrust of the cock in return. “Please, more.”

Rey obliged, picking up speed, her breathing heavy with exertion and pleasure. “Always so good for me, aren’t you Kylo? Telling me what you want, moaning so pretty for me. I love to see you like this.”

Kylo’s choked out moan sounded like a sob and she screwed her eyes shut, closing out the world to focus only on this, on Rey and the sensations wracking through her body. As always, it seemed Rey knew, as one hand left her hips to slide down her back and into her hair – longer now that she didn’t have Snoke using her dysphoria to fuel her instability for the sake of power – stroking through the tousled strands even as Rey kept the same steady rhythm. Kylo had to bite her lip to keep a pathetic noise from crawling out of her throat. It was so hard to keep control of herself like this.

“Let go,” Rey urged, breathless. “Let go for me, you precious girl.”

The words, as good as they made Kylo feel, also made something squeeze in her chest, tighter and tighter until it _broke_ and suddenly Kylo’s mind starting spinning without her permission. What Rey was doing felt so good, but did Kylo really deserve this? All she was and all she’d done – someone like her didn’t deserve this pleasure, didn’t deserve _Rey_. The sound that left her mouth next was closer to a sob than a moan.

The energy of the encounter shifted immediately and Rey must have felt the change in Kylo’s mood in the Force, because she stopped, not quite pulling out but ready to do so. “Hey, are you okay?”

Kylo couldn’t speak, just nodded and hoped Rey wouldn’t notice how tense she was. Fuck, she always ruined everything, didn’t she? They were having a perfectly good time and she’d gone and ruined it and now Rey would be disappointed, just like everyone else, and kriff, why did Kylo have to be like this? Maybe if she just kept quiet, Rey would continue on and everything would be fine.

Of course, Rey wasn’t buying it. “Kylo? I know something’s wrong. Please talk to me.”

The hand in Kylo’s hair started petting through the strands, gently urging Kylo to talk. _It’s okay_ , Kylo could hear through Rey’s touch and the emotions she was projecting, _please talk to me, I’m worried about you._

The last thing she wanted was Rey to worry – surely that was another thing she didn’t deserve, to have Rey care about her enough to be worried. “I’m fine, I promise.”

It didn’t sound convincing to Kylo’s ears and it must not have to Rey’s either. “Please don’t lie to me, I can feel something’s wrong. Do you want to stop?”

“No!” Kylo couldn’t hold her tongue on that; she truly didn’t want to and she definitely didn’t want to ruin this for Rey. “It just… it feels so good and I-”

Rey didn’t rush her, just kept stroking through her hair, the other hand gently stroking her hip as well. Rey was so good to her and Kylo…

“I don’t deserve it,” she blurted out. “I shouldn’t get to feel this good, not with who I am and what I’ve done. I don’t deserve pleasure. I don’t deserve to be called ‘good’ and ‘beautiful’. I don’t deserve _you_.”

And that was the real truth of it – she’d said it before, though not quite that bluntly, and she’d thought it countless times since leaving the First Order and going with Rey. Kylo couldn’t bring herself to turn and look at Rey, but she could feel Rey freeze, her hands no longer trying to comfort. Part of her wanted Rey to realize this truth and walk away, but the rest of her knew it would kill her to have that happen. But even then, wouldn’t Rey be better off?

“Oh, Kylo,” Rey finally said, her voice so sad and hurt that it made Kylo turn to see the pain in her expression. “How can you say that?”

Kylo didn’t know what to say, so Rey continued, “Look, I know what you’ve done better than anyone, and I know you had your reasons and that some of those weren’t your own, just a manipulation. But in the end, you made the _choice_ to stop. You _chose_ to make a change and become someone better, and you’ve continued to make that choice every day since.

“You could’ve easily gone back to your old ways at any time, but you’ve _chosen_ not to. You regret what you did and you help me and everyone else try to make it right. What more could we possibly ask of you after all this time?”

Kylo swallowed, a lump forming in her throat. She knew, logically, that everything Rey was saying was true, yet it didn’t _feel_ like it was. She felt like she needed to be _punished_ , not rewarded with pleasure and love and praise.

“That’s what’s important, don’t you see?” Rey insisted, her voice thick with conviction and emotion. “You made the _choice_ to be better and you keep making that choice every day, without fail. So how could you not deserve it? How could you not deserve to be treated nicely after, given all you’ve been through, you still chose to atone for the sins you committed?”

Kylo sniffled, blinking back tears, and said honestly, “I don’t know.”

Rey placed a kiss on Kylo’s temple, not quite able to reach her lips from this angle. “That’s because you _do_ deserve it. You want to do better than you did before and that’s all any of us can ever strive for.”

“Okay,” Kylo managed, trying to keep from fully sobbing and really ruining the mood.

Something was clicking into place in her mind but it was just… too much to deal with right now. She knew Rey was right, yet there was a part of Kylo that couldn’t accept it. Whether it was truly just because of the guilt or from all the years of Snoke manipulating her or something else entirely, she didn’t know, but she wasn’t ready to face it yet. Maybe one day, but right now, she would just accept that Rey believed it. That would have to be enough for now.

“I hope one day you can understand how precious you are to me,” Rey said, pressing another kiss to Kylo’s hairline, then another to her neck. “I don’t want to think of a life without you in it.”

Rey continued to kiss down her back and Kylo shuddered, her heart full and the desire from before coming back. She pushed her hips back, trying to get Rey’s attention that she wanted to continue where they left off before her crisis. Finally, she seemed to get the message, stroking through Kylo’s hair one last time before she shunted her hips forward again.

“Thank you,” Kylo moaned as Rey went right back to the rhythm from before, the insistent pace reminding Kylo just how needy she’d been before they stopped; as far as her body seemed to be concerned, the interruption had never happened.

“Of course. You’re so perfect for me,” Rey said, her tone so earnest that it struck Kylo to the core.

That was all it took for Kylo to break, a sound that was nearly wounded spilling from her lips, as Kylo pushed back against Rey’s hips, desperate for more and no longer able to hold back how much she needed it. Rey rewarded her by fucking in harder, the sound of her hips slapping against Kylo’s ass audible in the room. The hand in Kylo’s hair tightened, holding like an anchor, and Kylo savoured the pull of it.

“Stars,” Kylo cursed, scrambling until she could reach her cock and stroking it in time with Rey’s thrusts, and then whimpered, “Rey, I’m close.”

“So am I,” Rey panted, letting out a quiet moan of her own. “Come whenever you like, beautiful.”

Kylo groaned, a broken sound, and it was completely instinctual when she reached for the Force, tapping into the heavy haze of pleasure and love and want and need. Her own desperation mixed with Rey’s, and then the soft, aching, tender feelings underneath it. She’d felt Rey’s affection so many times as well as heard it verbally only a few minutes ago, yet it still knocked the breath from her chest, making her cry out as she squeezed her cock.

All her life, Kylo had never been good at expressing her feelings verbally, but like this, even if she was sometimes clumsy in her eagerness, she’d always been better at it, and she projected all she felt at this moment to Rey: _want, need, pleasure, love, thank you, thank you, thank you, please, love, close, need you._

Rey gasped, her hips jerking harder as she felt the torrent of Kylo’s emotions towards her, catching Kylo by surprise. Rey didn’t have as much practice as Kylo and she had to focus on keeping the pace, but she sent her own feelings back as best she could: _Beautiful, perfect, precious, love, desire, need, pleasure, good girl, come for me._

That was all it took to throw Kylo over the edge and she nearly sobbed as she came, her vision whiting out as she stroked herself and Rey fucked her through it, both of their movements desperate. Just as Kylo rode out the aftershocks of her own orgasm, Rey’s hips stuttered as she cried out and came as well, her orgasm a wave of pleasure through the Force. Kylo slumped and panted into the sheets, overwhelmed yet satisfied and feeling so incredibly good.

Behind her, Rey unbuckled the harness, the sound indicating she’d thrown it over the edge of the bed. Then hands ran up Kylo’s back, making her shiver, following by Rey pressing herself against Kylo’s back, her breasts and stomach soft and warm against Kylo’s skin. Kylo hummed in pleasure, melting into the embrace.

“Good?” Rey asked, knowing that sometimes she was too overwhelmed to speak after they had sex.

“Mhmm,” Kylo confirmed, turning her head so she could see Rey looking down at her with soft, loving eyes. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Rey said, smiling that perfect smile of hers. “You really are so precious to me, you know that, right?”

Kylo ducked her head, her cheeks warm. “I know it, even if I don’t understand it.”

She could feel Rey tense a bit, that very much not being the answer she wanted, but she eventually relaxed with a soft sigh. “That’s step one, then. I’ll make you understand one day, I swear it.”

Kylo couldn’t help but smile herself; for the moment, with this light, soft feeling in her chest, she could actually see that happening one day. “You know what? I believe you right now.”

Grinning, Rey planted a kiss to Kylo’s cheek as her mouth was too far away to reach. “Then I’d say step two is done, too.”

Kylo almost shook her head, but decided instead to shift enough to catch Rey’s mouth in a soft, lingering kiss, Rey reciprocating immediately. When they pulled away, Kylo noted the crinkles in the corner of Rey’s eyes as she smiled at her, Rey’s arms slipping around her to pull her closer. Kylo smiled back, all of her doubts and guilt forgotten for the moment. If she could love Rey and Rey could love her, well, maybe Kylo could one day feel at least some of that love towards herself as well.

**Author's Note:**

> Okay also this was my first attempt writing this pairing so, if you're reading this, I hope you enjoyed it! Please feel free to leave a comment/kudos if you did!


End file.
